There we were starving hungry in the middle of a village high street. Ripley if you want to know, and no not Ripley North Yorkshire, Ripley in Surrey. All manner of culinary delights appeared to be on offer from patisseries & coffee shops to very high end smart restuarants. However most were rather busy what with it being 1.30pm on a rainy Saturday in July. Then we spotted a pub. A lovely old fashioned type pub with hanging baskets & higgledy piggledy doors & windows & a big fancy chalk board outsde that proclaimed "Food served daily 12-6pm".
We looked for the menu outside & couldn't find one (clue #1) so peered though the windows & saw a free table - hurrah huzzah we thought. But that was clue #2. A free table. Then we stepped over the threshold and unwittingly stepped back 40 years. The bar was decent enough with a few people standing around chatting about their day & another couple were sat at a table in small room off the bar. Nothing significant at this point to tell us we had been transported back to the 1970's...
Drinks were duly ordered and the menu which was chalked up at the side of the bar perused. Clue #3; not a single vegetarian option. Reminders of the bad old days in my teens when all I could get was a cheese sandwich, salad or omelette came flooding back. All the food was what I've heard called "proper" food; burgers, chicken, a mixed grill, sausage & mash, gammon egg & chips ... help I thought I can't eat anything ... then right at the bottom I spotted the soup of the day was mushroom & a selection of "freshly made" sandwiches were available. Feeling pleased with myself I ordered the soup & a cheese & pickle sandwich on granary please, imagining farmhouse cheddar, homemade red onion pickle & a side salad. "So that's a cheese sandwich on white?" said the barman. No, no I began correcting, then saw he was telling not asking - they only had white. OK I thought could be a lovely farmhouse batch, let's go for white. Clue #4. I would've made a rubbish Agatha Christie detective. FauxSurreyHubby smirked & ordered himself a mixed grill and we found a table.
Sitting down and looking around us more carefully the reality of our time travelling became apparent - and when a bowl of Heinz Mushroom soup appeared with a single slice of Mothers Pride white bread laid carefully to one side the penny dropped. Then my 2 slices of white bread sandwich replete with grated cheese & a dollop of Branston & FSH's greasy grill appeared & were were left in no doubt we were in a pub stuck in the 1970's. Accepting our fate we tucked in & pondered ... would we go outside & find the Volvo miraculously transformed into a Ford Cortina ...?
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